As hectic and tense things may seem at the moment, my feelings are pretty much grounded. I mean, when Taylor and I said we were ready to enter this relationship, we both knew there would be consequences. Consequence #1: the This Time Around promotional tour. Okay, I walked around like a deer in headlights for the first few days, but after the initial worry and phrases to Kayla, like: “I don’t think I am *ever* going to see him again,” I seemed to calm down quite a bit.

Sorry there has been no updates for the longest time. But, that’s what work does to you. In between tackling Uni work and looking for a part time job (there’s one at the record store I went for... surely I’m a shoe-in) everyone seems to think I’m a walking zombie. But, when I sit down for some quiet time, everything sort of evens out pretty well.

It’s really late at the moment.

Diary, don’t you just hate it when the people around you can’t stop telling you what to do? I mean, I’ve had almost every single person come up to me and almost get down on the floor and beg me to go touring with the boys. What will that do for me? I would have to defer Uni, watch the adoring fans paw into the boys and scowl at me, and to top it off, it would just remind me of how non-famous I am. Do you ever get the feeling that no matter how many times you tell a person something, they’ll still never listen?

Okay... I may as well start on the next item on my agenda. Kayla and Isaac. Enough? Well, there’s more. They have some kind of sick, tensed up argumentative brawl going on at the moment and even though Charlie’s in the city, he’s as much a part of it as I am. If it wasn’t for him, I don’t think I would have survived at all... Ike complains about her to me, and she complains to me about him. I can’t win. They are both such close friends and I hate being in the middle of it all. It’s going to get even worse.

Today I came home to see Kayla, hands on hips at one end of the room and a screwed up Seventeen magazine in the corner. The look of fury on Kayla’s face was immense.

“What?” I asked, cautiously eyeing the barely readable magazine.

“He thinks he can just shove what we *had* in my face and not even care the slightest about it! That’s what!”

“Kayla, what are you talking about?” Kayla marched across the room and picked up Natalie Portman’s crinkled face and opened to a random page.

“I dated a girl for 4 years, but it didn’t work out,” she threw the magazine at me and began pacing the room.

“He didn’t want to call you his girlfriend?” I eyed the magazine, curiously.

“Not only that... where did he get four years from? That’s what’s bugging me!” Kayla threw herself back on the lounge and gasped in anger. “It didn’t work out,” she mimicked.

“Kayla...” I tried to reach out and comfort her, but she just pulled away.

It was then that Margo appeared in the doorway, making matters worse. Being less than discreet, she was almost shouting obscenities through the screen door before I let her in. “Why the hell did Zac say that he didn’t have a girlfriend?” Yet again, the famous Seventeen Magazine raises it’s ugly head.

“Margo,” I was walking towards the kitchen to find something to calm Kayla down. “You have to understand that if the guys release that they have girlfriends, the press will have a field day and it could effect their fans.”

“Why would it effect their fans? What about the music?” She seemed annoyed at the whole issue, slamming the magazine down on the table.

“I know, I don’t understand either. It’s just something you’re going to have to deal with right now.” I left her to stew in the kitchen. I feel bad about it now, she hadn’t seen Zac in ages. I’d have to admit that she’s so far had a less than fortunate year to date... but my main concern at the moment was preventing Kayla from, A, jumping out the window, or, B, phoning Seventeen to set the record straight.

She’s in bed now, I suggested that she wait until the morning until she made contact with Isaac. I don’t know if she will. Time will tell I suppose. I think she’s just having a majorly tough time getting over this.

Surprisingly, Margo crashed on the couch. She must be having troubles at home. We invited her for dinner and she just didn’t seem to go home. I don’t mind, this house is so empty. And, staying on the Margo issue... I just hope that everything works out between her and Zac... I would hate for anymore anguish in her life... and Zac seems like he’s going to crack if there’s anymore changes. Well, that’s just my opinion.

Few days til’ the US release of the album. I hope it goes well... The guys are going to be up in NYC around that time. They’ll probably drop in on Charlie... but, unless Kayla and I decide to go to LA, I don’t think we’re going to see them for a while.

I better get going. ‘Night.

note to readers: just a little reminder that this is very much fiction, and actual comments made in a certain magazine article had nothing to do with any of us in real life. We are not associated with Hanson, Universal, Island/Def Jam - etc. Questions? Comments? E-mail.
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